Love and basketball is one of the greatest movies ever invented!!! I'm watching it right now.... I can remember watching it when I was like 15 or 16 for the very first time. I slept on the couch that night and when dad got up to milk that morning i woke up... Love and basketball was on tv at 5 in the morning... I can remember after she fouled out and they lost the game I BAWLED!!! I have no idea why, but that was so sad to me! Right now I'm watching the end.... And it's soooo sad to me now! Hahaha I laugh cuz I cry pied at the part she fouled out but the end is the really sad part! How could u tell someone you didn't wanna marry them 2 weeks before the wedding??? I'm glad it worked out for Q and Monica but I feel for the other girl! And at the end when she's playin in the Wnba and she waves at her daughter that is soooo cute!! I would love to play pro ball and have my daughter watch me!!!! I think I should just start my own WNBa team of girls who just wanna pay for fun!!!! I prolly have enough for a team already! I miss ball so much! There's no way I could get in shape again! Maybe I could actually but it would be tough prolly. So yesterday on my way to Walmart I was thinkin of how when I was in college or high school I would make a list of stuff I needed at walmart but I wouldn't make it too much cuz I didn't wanna have to push a cart!!! I hated pushing a cart cuz that's what old people do! Well I was thinkin now that I never go in Walmart without a cart!!! Guess I'm an old person! You know what I hate though? They are a,ways stuck together and for some reason I can never figure out how to get them apart and it's so embarrassing!!!! Hahaha! So let me tell you this! Everyone should know we went fishing last night (me mom dad Gracie Paul and Dustin) and I caught like 10 fish!!!!! And mom caught maybe 1 or 2..... And no one else caught any!!!! Hahahahhahahahhahahahah! I love winning! Only 2 were big enough to keep.... But at least I caught some! The black bass were surfacing last night! Big time! Beleive it or not... Dustin actually had a good time. We went to Walmart tonight to buy him a new pole and some jigs! Haha and he had to look online for some boats! Prolly not gonna buy one just checking prices! Maybe someone will trade him a boat for some tires! Haha he trades for everything else! Oh my gosh... Just saw that sad puppy dog commercial!! Please help them! They look so sad! That commercial makes me sad!!! So today we cleaned out our barn! Geeez we went to the dumpsters once and have another load in the truck ready to go! It was a mess! I'm so glad we are cleaning it up! We cleaned the porch off too! It looks so good! We shouldve done it a long time ago! So I think I need to get my masters!! But what do I get it in? And whenever I think about masters degree I think about Home Imorovement! When Jill is getting her masters or doxtorette? I dunno anyways she has to write a thesis and apparently it's hard.... If its hard I don't wanna do it! Haha! You know one time I was so obsessed with home improvement that I even bought the game! Bet you didn't know there was a game.. Haha! You know what else I love??? Saved by the bell! And boy meets world! And last night when Dustin wasn't in the bedroom I actually watched hey Arnold!! Hahahaha. And I love Doug!! That was one of my fav kids shows! Ok it's bedtime!

Blog...... Isn't that a funny word? I need to go to the beach!!!!! I've only been to the beach twice I think..... The first time was because my softball team was goin to nationals!! Woooo go gentry baseburners! That was the funniest time of my life! (close anyways) I played horrible there.. I remember! The cool thing... When we won state.. In Arkansas it was raining and our moms told us not to get in the mud... And after we won we all went and sliddddddd in the mud! We were so muddy!!!!! I love that I can remember that. I still remember going to Chrystal ford's house early that morning to pick them up. And my grandma and grandpa went with us. Oh how fun. The thing I miss most About being younger is the sports. I played coed softball until I had to quit cuz I couldn't stand to see someone up there all the time! Isnt it weird how you can remember things.... But some things you only barely remember? I remember winning state in basketball but we got an award or something at the state Capitol and I can't remember that At all...... But I have a picture haha. Sooo I miss my friends... You know what's really cool though.. Me and my friends get together at least like 7 times a year (all our bdays) plus I see them all the time anyways..... Im so lucky to still have all my friends from high school around here (except Sara :( wish she was here) I got my hair cut today and I absolutly love it!!!!! Darkened it too! I think I really wanna do photography!!!!! If all else fails I could just take pics of my own family...... I cannot beleive that Wednesday is July 4!!!!!! Already??? June actually went by really slow.. I wish it would rain. So I love selling scentsy!!!! So how about teen mom... I love teen mom!!! That Farrah girl is sooooo hateful! Her mom and dad need to slap her! Amber is rude and idiotic.... I feel sorry for her daughter! Maci is really cool...I just wish her and Ryan would get back together!!!! He's hot!!! Except for that fake yawn! And Caitlyn is the best one on the show.... She is so grown up.. Or acts that way anyways.. Shes not about pleasing anybody but herself and Tyler... They are too cute! And the bachelorette? I hope that one guy wins... Was his name Steve? I can't remember.... Tall hot blonde? I don't like arie... I kinda do but somethin is weird about him.. Can't wait for the hometown dates on Monday!! And army wives is sucking me back in again it was so good last Sunday!!!! Ok so I have a question..... Let's say you had a kid who's daddy left when she was like 5 months old... And saw the real dad a few times between the 5 months and 11 months.. Like maybe 7 times.. (but he never paid any attention to her... Only to you) and after the 11 month mark never saw her again.... And now she's over 3 1/2 years old..... When would u decide it's time to mention her "real" (fake ignorant nasty icky disgusting whorebag loser liar psycho psychopath cheater cheater pumpkin eater scum bag) dad? The thing is I don't know if he will ever have the opportunity to know her.... Cuz I will try my DAMN-DEST (is that how u spell it) to not let it ever happen!!!!!!! I mean there are so many possibilities. What if she never knows him? I could hide it forever she'd never know.... But then I'd be a liar.... Bt she knows she has brothers.... That don't live with us and she never sees them... It's like the hardest thing ever.... Who knows what the heck to do. I think it's too early now and I really dread EVER telling her..... Cuz he's quite the brainwasher ..... If he wanted anything to do with her he would've tried 3 years ago!!!! Off that subject. I'm watching 21 jump street... I don't understand why all movies have to have such vulgar language in them! Theres a movie called taking of pelham 123 or something like that. It's one of the best movies I've ever saw!! But they use the f-word more than I've prolly heard it in my entire life!!! Ok I have to watch snooki and jwow now! :)

Sometimes there's those things in life when you have to say is this really happening to me.... Or why do bad things happen to good people. Sometimes you just have to trust in God and realize that he has your whole life mapped out! You just take it as it comes and continue to trust in Him! I've been thru so much on my life and I am soooooo happy now! I realize God did have a plan! And I am now happy. I have a beautiful baby girl that came out of the worst part of my life. During that part of my life I was at my worst. I was still "good" and what not I wasn't doin bad stuff.... But I was sooooo beaten down! I looked down on myself because someone made me think I was crap. And I let it happen. Tried to keep me from my friends. I had to stay home with HIS kids while he did whatever (everyone knows what he was doing) he wanted! All day everyday. Yesterday or the day before I said men don't change..... Ok maybe they do. A woman can't make them change... They have to WANT to change. They have to want to find good out of it. They have to do it for God and they have to mean it. it has to be up to them. If they say they will change for you..... You say I don't want you to change for me... I want you to change for God! Because you want to change not because I want you to. But the particular one I was speaking of the other day (actually there were 2) WILL NOT change! Ok off that subject. Maybe. There this song called finally home by Kerrie Roberts. Absolutely amazing song. Let me show you the lyrics: Finally Home" is available on iTunes and Amazon . I miss the feeling that I belong  Surrounded by the love that I know at home I never get to stay long I might stop, but I then I gotta move on When I'm not there, there's a craving in me An ache so strong that I can't believe There's a place that's better Where I'll spend forever When I'm finally home And I finally know What it really means to praise his name What it feels like to know amazing grace And there's no more road Nowhere else to go Nothing left to miss Nothing left for this wandering soul When I'm finally home I'm reminded again and again I live in this world as a stranger and As good as it's been Or as bad as it gets, it all will end I want to stand where hope and faith and love All meet in one face Oh, I wanna be where I can see What I now believe  The ultimate healing Where hurt can't reach me I won't need to find every answer All I need will be found within your presence Isn't that good? When you in pain here just remember what's coming! When you feel hurt remember God is there! And one day you will understand what all the suffering was for. It's sad to think about the world ending.. I wanna see my daughter grow up. I wanna know what she is gonna be when she gets bigger. But it's really not sad at all. It's an amazing feeling to know there will be no more pain and suffering! Who knows how long it will be... Only God. But I am ready and I hope you are too! So I watched the news last night and saw Dallas on there! Amazing! Heather looked so beautiful! Heather you are famous! I'm so glad Dallas is ok. So all my life I've only been stopped by a cop like 3 times.... Maybe. Well last night it happened TWICE!!! One was a road block and I reached in the back to get my license and everything dumped out of my purse. And believe it or not I had my seatbelt on! I had it on when I left which is very strange! But I was so embarrassed cuz I had to ask him "can I take my seatbelt off and get out and get my license.." hahaha I was so embarrassed!!! But you know they are always afraid you are gonna pull guns on them. I got pulled over one time by the Stillwater police and they come up to your vehicle all freaky like.... They REALLY think someone is gonna pull guns on the. The 2nd time last night we were writing a note to leave on someone's mailbox And a sheriff pulls up and said what are you guys up to? I laughed and said writing a note! He laughed and said a note??? Well that's old fashioned! Anyways.... It was funny. Then on the way home there's a cop behind Dustin and he is right on his rear.... Then he passes him in a no passing zone!!!! I was so mad! Because I've been stopped before for following a cop too close..... But it's ok for them to follow us too close???? And pass in a no passing zone????? Huh? Doesn't make sense to me. Don't get me wrong I'm sure some cops are fine and normal but when they think they can get by with what we can't, something should be done. I'm really getting into this writing thing. I told Dustin earlier we should buy a pawn shop..... That would be sooooo fun!!!! He laughed at me. He's so mean. Haha. I said well I wanna own something. Paul said you need an ice cream shop!!!! How fun would that be!!!!!! And I could have shaved ice!!! Then I would be a cow cuz I couldn't stop eating it!!!!! I loooooooove me some shaved ice! Also! Im soooooo ready to buy my own house! I want a yard! Nt rocks! And a back yard! Not a barn! Hahahaha! I wanna plant flowers..... ! Ohhhh one can dream! Well I think I'm gonna go swimming!!! Once again : Happy reading :)

I've decided I need to carry a notebook everywhere I go! I was driving today and was thinkin about all kinds of stuff I cold write !!!! And now I get time to sit down and I forget!!!!! All of it!!!so while I'm cooking I actually find time to write. I looked at the keyboards for an iPad at Walmart yesterday!!!! They were 80 bucks!!!! I'd be crazy to spend that kind of money! Tonight I'm trying a new recipe one of my lovely friends gave me... I hope it's good. It's chicken and sour cream and cream of mushroom soup wi ritz crackers on too! It better be good. I decided I'd make macaroni and mashed taters to go with it... Cuz d loves mashed taters. Today while I was at my sisters I decided it would be so fun to be a photographer!!!!!!! And the place I live at has perfect background for photography. Ok it just sounds fun I doubt that will actually ever happen. Wonder if there's people that just get paid to write!!!! That would be fun! My mind overflows sometimes. I would be a good person to write reviews about the bachelorette show! I have so much on my mind during that show but no one to tell it to cuz no one else watches it except Brittany swank!!!! And she just makes fun of it!! Hahahahahaha!! Last night when I was in bed I was thinking about liars! Why do people lie? And how do people lie? I might've tried to lie a couple of times in my life and the truth always came out. Apparently I'm not a good liar! I just wish all liars would be caught!!!! (And put in jail)lol! I know they will on judgement day but I'd like for it to come out on earth too! It is just stupid to lie! Never understood it. Another thing..... Why in the world would u lie.... In front of or to your kids... Now about stuff like oh were out of candy.... By stuff like ahhhhhhhh I can't say it! Smeone might read this! Hahahaha! Let me just tell you this.... It's cool to become friends with your exes ex. Hahahah. Ok I'll say what I was gonna say. People telling kids that's it's someone else's fault you don't get to see your kid. Do the kids believe him... I don't know... Hopefully not. Cuz it is absolutely not my fault. Ive offered several times in the first year and it never happened..... Sooooo therefore not my fault. And now that it's been almost 3 years... Whyyyyyy in the world would I do that to my child? I'm in this world to protect my children not ruin them or hurt them or teach them the wrongly ways in life! I dont use my child, never will. Unlike some people! And 1 person may not be all I'm talkin about, I'm sure there's more. You see why I want a blog? Once I start typing about something I just blow up with stuff. My fingers don't go fast enough. And my food is burning hahahaha!ok it's not really burnt. Yu know what else I'd like to be? A chef.... How weird is that? I'm like a little kid deciding what I wanna be when I grow up....but I found my career in teaching but something on the side would be fun. Men are ridiculous! Why do women believe them when they say I'll change I promise.... Hahahahahahhaha what a joke. I'm sure women do the same thing but ive only heard it from men and about men. Ladies listen here!!!!! They don't change!!!!! When me Nd Dustin got together he TOLD me be wasn't gonna change.... Guess what: at least he didn't lie!!! Haha! Guess there are honest men around. When they cry and say they will change it is fake!!! They have to change for the,selves not for someone else. You are not gonna change them. If they wanna change they will... Don't you love those songs that come on the radio and bring back memories of things..... Poor Kelly has to listen to them at nap time. They are always the depressing ones. I love depressing songs! I find a song to play the I tell Kelly exactly what it reminds me of! How funny! So I'm addicted to the ID channel! Ever watched It? It's investigation discovery.... About murders and stuff. For some reason I love it. And It makes me have the scariest dream but oh well I like it. You should watch it. Ok I think it may be bed time for me. But when I try to go to sleep my brain will run wild again! Hahaha Happy reading! :)

Life these days

Ok so it's hard to type what I'm thinking on my iPad I can't type as fast as on a keyboard.... First of all I wanna say snow cones are amazing! This is just a test blog by the way because all the stuff that was on my mind went away! So I've been working out on the elliptical in the barn. Bt it's soooo boring, so tonight i put the headphones on my iPhone And cranked up the music! What song you ask? MOVE by mercy me I believe! Well this made me not wanna stop exercising! That is such a great song to just crank up! Only problem was G was in bed and I just wanted to sing soooooo loud! By the way guys... I love to sing! I mean LOVE! When I had my Toyota and the radio didn't work I would record myself singing songs on my phone!! Haha how embarrassing!!!! But I really LOVE to sing!!!!! If I was good I'd find me a guitarist (maybe my cousin lance) aNd start a band! Hahahaha ! So lately I've been feeling I need to do more! Such as job wise.... For some strange reason I'd like to own my own business but I wouldn't know what! And I'd also like to go back to school but I don't know for what on that either..... I loved college(kinda) and I didn't even party! I love teaching Pre-k! Absolutely love it! But one of the reasons why I love my job so much is because of my aid! Kelly! She is absolutely amazing! She lets me talk aLl the time! Hahaha what would I do without her! Kelly please don't ever leave me!! Haha jk... But also let me tell you something else about teaching this year especially..... I had close ties with a lot of the parents. Being friends with them on Facebook . For some reason it helps you Understand the child more if you actually know what's going on in there lives! (I'm sure some cases Aren't this way) but this year I had REALLY good parents! Very understanding and helpful. That helps so much! You have no IDEa. I had a bit of a rough year but looking back on it, it was great! Mostly because the parents helped so much especially in disciplining their children. I greatly appreciate that! I posted a pic on Facebook last night and it was so true! Sometimes it may be the teachers fault about the grades but in most cases it's not! If a teacher truly loves her job she will do her best!!!! And that I do! Sometimes I feel like I don't do enough but I know I did my best! All kids are different and it takes some longer to catch on..... Not a big deal at all! They need time to absorb it! Ok off that subject!!!! I did t realize I was actually gonna write that much! What was on my mind had nothing to do with that! So lately things have been happening wayyyy to close to home! Deaths, near deaths.... Etc. makes ya wanna get right with God ehhhh? Well hopefully... If not there may be something wrong with you.haha! Jk! I told my friend that today (Chaney) and she said "that's why I plead the blood over my family every day" ! Amen Chaney! You are an amazing mother!!!!! Don't you wish all mothers were like Chaney? Hehe! Even myself! I wish I could be better. I feel so bad sometimes for spanking my daughter. But I see kids everyday who do these unacceptable things and I can't do anything about it but when it's my daughter you can bet she's gonn get in trouble! I see kids that I don't want her to act like (in Walmart and other places)! And then when I put her in bed at night I feel so bad for being so mean. I just want her to be good! Ya know? Anyways! So Paul is a big brother now!!! Lucky kid! He's so loved!!! Him and G were talking last night about it and he said hey tomorrow I'm gonna go see my brother... And G said who his name? And Paul didn't answer. G says Paul? Paul? His name gonna be Paul??? Paul? Hahaha it was so funny! They have the best conversations... I love listening in on them.... When they are getting aLong! Ok hmm is that all? There are things on my mind that I don't wanna put on here cuz I wouldn't want someone to read it! Notice Im putting G instead of my daughters name...... If I could put those things on here I'd blow this thing up!!! Hahahaha! Ok maybe I'll buy a keyboard for my iPad so I can type better and more and more of what's really on my mind! By for now I guess I'm done. I forgot everything else! Remember to pray for those in need and hurting... I'm sure the list is long but God knows your every need! At the top of my list is the Barnwell family! Bless their hearts! May God be with them. And Dallas Cheek and family are next. Praise God he's ok! He really had His hand on Dallas! I pray for my grandma and grandpa everyday! I love them so much! It's so sad to think one day you will have to say bye.....Or cya later! Ok I have to go I'm gonna cry now! Happy Reading!!! :)