Sometimes there's those things in life when you have to say is this really happening to me.... Or why do bad things happen to good people. Sometimes you just have to trust in God and realize that he has your whole life mapped out! You just take it as it comes and continue to trust in Him! I've been thru so much on my life and I am soooooo happy now! I realize God did have a plan! And I am now happy. I have a beautiful baby girl that came out of the worst part of my life. During that part of my life I was at my worst. I was still "good" and what not I wasn't doin bad stuff.... But I was sooooo beaten down! I looked down on myself because someone made me think I was crap. And I let it happen. Tried to keep me from my friends. I had to stay home with HIS kids while he did whatever (everyone knows what he was doing) he wanted! All day everyday. Yesterday or the day before I said men don't change..... Ok maybe they do. A woman can't make them change... They have to WANT to change. They have to want to find good out of it. They have to do it for God and they have to mean it. it has to be up to them. If they say they will change for you..... You say I don't want you to change for me... I want you to change for God! Because you want to change not because I want you to. But the particular one I was speaking of the other day (actually there were 2) WILL NOT change! Ok off that subject. Maybe. There this song called finally home by Kerrie Roberts. Absolutely amazing song. Let me show you the lyrics: Finally Home" is available on iTunes and Amazon . I miss the feeling that I belong  Surrounded by the love that I know at home I never get to stay long I might stop, but I then I gotta move on When I'm not there, there's a craving in me An ache so strong that I can't believe There's a place that's better Where I'll spend forever When I'm finally home And I finally know What it really means to praise his name What it feels like to know amazing grace And there's no more road Nowhere else to go Nothing left to miss Nothing left for this wandering soul When I'm finally home I'm reminded again and again I live in this world as a stranger and As good as it's been Or as bad as it gets, it all will end I want to stand where hope and faith and love All meet in one face Oh, I wanna be where I can see What I now believe  The ultimate healing Where hurt can't reach me I won't need to find every answer All I need will be found within your presence Isn't that good? When you in pain here just remember what's coming! When you feel hurt remember God is there! And one day you will understand what all the suffering was for. It's sad to think about the world ending.. I wanna see my daughter grow up. I wanna know what she is gonna be when she gets bigger. But it's really not sad at all. It's an amazing feeling to know there will be no more pain and suffering! Who knows how long it will be... Only God. But I am ready and I hope you are too! So I watched the news last night and saw Dallas on there! Amazing! Heather looked so beautiful! Heather you are famous! I'm so glad Dallas is ok. So all my life I've only been stopped by a cop like 3 times.... Maybe. Well last night it happened TWICE!!! One was a road block and I reached in the back to get my license and everything dumped out of my purse. And believe it or not I had my seatbelt on! I had it on when I left which is very strange! But I was so embarrassed cuz I had to ask him "can I take my seatbelt off and get out and get my license.." hahaha I was so embarrassed!!! But you know they are always afraid you are gonna pull guns on them. I got pulled over one time by the Stillwater police and they come up to your vehicle all freaky like.... They REALLY think someone is gonna pull guns on the. The 2nd time last night we were writing a note to leave on someone's mailbox And a sheriff pulls up and said what are you guys up to? I laughed and said writing a note! He laughed and said a note??? Well that's old fashioned! Anyways.... It was funny. Then on the way home there's a cop behind Dustin and he is right on his rear.... Then he passes him in a no passing zone!!!! I was so mad! Because I've been stopped before for following a cop too close..... But it's ok for them to follow us too close???? And pass in a no passing zone????? Huh? Doesn't make sense to me. Don't get me wrong I'm sure some cops are fine and normal but when they think they can get by with what we can't, something should be done. I'm really getting into this writing thing. I told Dustin earlier we should buy a pawn shop..... That would be sooooo fun!!!! He laughed at me. He's so mean. Haha. I said well I wanna own something. Paul said you need an ice cream shop!!!! How fun would that be!!!!!! And I could have shaved ice!!! Then I would be a cow cuz I couldn't stop eating it!!!!! I loooooooove me some shaved ice! Also! Im soooooo ready to buy my own house! I want a yard! Nt rocks! And a back yard! Not a barn! Hahahaha! I wanna plant flowers..... ! Ohhhh one can dream! Well I think I'm gonna go swimming!!! Once again : Happy reading :)