i love the fact that i wait until 8:00 every sunday night to start my homework that is due by 11 sunday night! HAHAHAH IM AN IDIOT!!! i had to keep singing to myself "i like myself, i like myself" hahaha because i was thinkin man i hate myself i'm so stupid why do i wait until 3 hours before its due to EVEN START ON IT!!!! anyways i got it dont. way early too. it was pretty easy. i thought it was a lot harder than what it was. sure when i was done it was 15 pages long... but it was still easier than i thought hahahahah. here's whats weird: after sitting here fretting over how terrible i was doing and what the heck am i gonna write next.... when i'm done and i reread it, I'm thinking DANG this sounds professional and I'm kinda proud of myself and then i want to print it off and post it everywhere for everyone to read. These classes are hard and they beat me down and make me think i'm so dumb, but after i do the stuff, it reall picks me up and makes me think dang did i do that? Makes me feel good about myself to know that I can write something THAT GOOD! HAHA! anyways. If you'd read one, you'd be amazed. especially after writing on here with no capital letters except for HAHA and .... and !!!! haha. i actually can type normal. i'm just too lazy especially having to double space, indent, .5 margin, 2 spaces after a period.... hahahah APA is ridiculous! and after all that typing... i still have time for a blog post. how fun. i should get my butt in bed because ill not be able to get up in the morning. its so hard for me to get out of bed. probably because i stay up so late. i should start going to bed earlier and getting up earlier. that might work. but i doubt it. don't you hate when you have dreams and when you wake up they seem so real...... i really HATE that. and especially when you think about it all day. and you're like i know that really happened. ok no more! Ciao

Ok I'm in bed early tonight! You know why? Ok the number one reason is because I stayed home with my stinky butt kid today (and I mean stinky butt.... Will explain later) and she didn't have a nap so she was in bed at 745.... She went to sleep pretty quick, poor sleepy baby! The number 2 reason is because I wanted to watch a lifetime movie!!!! I've gotten so addicted to them! Only problem is they have commercials when they go to commercials I fall asleep and miss the good part! The one on tonight doesn't look very good! Ok now on to my stinky butt child... Well Tuesday she threw up all day, and had the runs. My mom told me how bad it stunk but I didn't think it could be THIS bad... So we leave moms and get almost to the bottom of the hill, and SHE POOPS HER PANTS!!!! She says "I'm poopiiiiiing" I said what? Your pooping? Well stop!!!! Are you still? She said yes and was about to bawl.. And I busted up laughing!!!! Then she laughed instead.. But she had the runs SSSOOO BAD! And it smelt TERRIBLE!! Worse than a dead animal! Poor baby! Luckily she had the poops this morning... But hasn't pooped anymore. So I think she is all better! So this morning I was layin in bed waiting for her to wake up and I was watching tv playin on my iPad and I had it propped up on my leg and it fell and hit my lip and it hurt SO BAD!!!!! I coulda said a bad word! Speaking of ba words... My mom French braided my hair and it hurt SO bad! I seriously felt like I was gonna pass out! I said several bad words I couldn't control them.... My head hurt so bad... It was like I wasn't in there.... I think I almost died! Actually dying might have been less painful!!!!!! Gah! Ok hm what else have I thought about today? I guess nothing.... It's supposed to freeze drizzle In the morning... OH speaking of that colcord is out of school the next two days! Geeeeeeez!!!! So I have to do an observation and interview this week for my class.. I'm so unprepared! Haven't even looked at the assignment .. Oh but in 2 weeks, I get to "Write a letter to the editor designed to educate members of your community about the critical role of child-centered curriculum and play in children's development and learning. Cite specific references and give examples that illustrate your thinking." I am super excited about this!!! I have SSSSOOO much to say on this subject!!!! I may even send it to the editor.... Hahaha jk only kidding! But I've been talking about this for a while now and I'm ready to spit my opinions out so someone can read them!!!! Here's what's strange to me... The other day I heard some negative comments about our school.... I'm gonna be honest.. In my classes, when I talk about our school, I always say we have the best elementary school in the county (other than grove....lol).. I really think we do! Others may not see it this way, but if they seen how much work and money we put into what we do, they would change their mind.... I feel sometimes that I push my kids too hard, but I want them so bad to learn what I'm supposed to teach them... Even though sometimes it just takes maturity to catch on.... Some kids aren't mature enough to learn their letters (or whatever) yet.... Therefore need another year. And by no means is another year a bad thing.... It will only help them in the end... Anyways back to what I was sayin... I don't know much about the upper grades, I DEFiNITLY know they work hard cuz they are ALWAYS at school before I get there and after I leave for quite a while. They have a lot harder curriculum than us for sure, so I guarantee they work twice as hard! I absolutly love where I work! I don't think I could ever have a job that I would love as much as I love this one.... It's just Sooo relaxed and laid back, everyone is down to earth and friendly.... I LOVE my job. I can't say that enough. Why am I getting my masters? I absolutly love what I'm doing..... I'm sure one day it'll get old and ill HATE everyone I work with and they'll hate me back.... Hahahahahaha jk... But I'm sure I'm not always gonna wanna be a pre k teacher. Man I feel like I'm ranting.... That class just opens my mind so much! Brings a lot of insights to me. It's weird this year things are soaking in so much faster with my class.... Seems like when I first started it took them forever for the kids to learn to write their name!!! Right now mine can all write their first AND last.. And we're working on middle name! I've NEVER had them write their middle name..... But they have mastered first and last names.... Might as well give them an extra boost since they have already caught on to that so easily! Ok welp hope my rant isn't annoying.... Oh wait it always is! OH WELL!!!!!! :)

OMG!!! Tonight is the best tv night EVER!!!!!!!! i LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE monday nights!!!! I just cried on the bachelor. it was sooooooooo precious!!!! at 9:00 teen mom 2 and Lizard Lick towing comes on!!! YAYYYY! and then catfish at 10! YESSSSSSSS PERFECT NIGHT! today was a much needed day off from work! I went to walmart and spent a good day in town. soooooooooooooo i have to tell you.... if you use cream of mushroom or cream of chicken soup quite a bit.... go to campbellskitchen.com and click on coupons, print off the $1/5 of soups or whatever and go to walmart right now they're .75 so you can get 5 for .55 each.. which is cheap because its REGULAR priced $1.25 per can!!! so GO NOW!!!!! it's on sale from thanksgiving and christmas stil, but i'm sure itll go back up soon!!! i have like 30 or more cans.... that i've bought. as soon as i can print more coupons ill get more too because itll keep forever and its cheap! yes... that was my coupon queen moment!!! You know what I forgot about how exited I was!!!!!!!!!!! I'm in the 3rd week of my class and the first week was only discussion... Which was AWESOME!!! Last week we had discussion, blog, and an application.. which was a workshop outline.. we had to create a workshop for teachers that talked about why its important to get parents involved.. and then a 3 page reflection! Anyways on my week 1 discussions i got 3.75's on both. on my week 2 discussion I GOT A 4!!!!!!!!!!!!!! In case you dont remember, on my last class my first few weeks i just got 3's and 3.25's it was soooo hard to get 4's. and now I've already got a 4! SO EXCITING!!!!!! This week for our application we have to do an observation, when parents are around... so like when they bring their kids in the morning.... i guess. anyways itll be fun hopefully! I decided today I need to sit down and do all my applications so they are ready to turn in.. that way i'm not up til 11 every sunday night doing homework! I'm sooooo bad at that. maybe ill get better. it's just so hard... because i'm too tired every night, i'm just ready for bed and i can't do it when G is awake. let's see... anything else? hmmmm.... i had over half my class out of school last week with sickness... craaazy! 2 days i had half of them gone. thursday they helped me clean my whole room.... it was fun!!!! alright i guess i'm gone now!

IM AMAZED!!!

Right now I'm 100% amazed! I just asked my husband if he would ever adopt a kid.. And he said yea... I said WHAT????? Then I thought oh I bet he thinks I'm talking about g... so I said "you would? Like between g and p's age?" He said "yea."..... I'm shocked! I totally thought hed never even consider that!!!!!!!!! That kinda made my heart melt...... Awwwwwwwwwwww! My husband may have a heart....... That's precious! I would never bring another child into this terrible-becoming world (unless its Gods plan of course) but I would totally love to help one that is already in the world and needs someone! Now this was NEVER in my plan... But some things have been brought up and I've actually thought about it..... Whether it will ever happen.... I dunno, BUT if its meant to happen, it will! It kinda makes me happy to think about... Anyways.... That's all! That's just made my day almost! :)

new years resolutions..... cuz everyone has them!

Ok my new years resolutions are kinda insane! and I will probably break every one of them!!!!!!!!!!!!!! last year i made a resolution to dress better and dress myself up more... did that happen... well maybe at first but that was like unrealistic! HAHA! I wear nice clothes to work and what happens? I get paint on them and theyre stained and RUINED!!!!!!!!! i might as well have wore my nice clothes to the milk barn! So if anyone wonders why i never dress up dress up at school its cuz of that! and maybe im a little lazy at 7 in the morning... I've been thinking a lot in the past week about what i need to do better this year. and then today i was driving and i was thinking about things that would make me a better person! I was thinkin about those times in walmart (or AT SCHOOL) when you see those people you really DONT wanna see..... and you either get your phone out and look at it, act like your looking at something, or act like you don't see them..... I'm going to make it a point to not make myself miserable over things like that. I will stare them in the eye and they can be the ones to pretend they don't see me because honestly thats annoying and immature(even though i do it all the time) We are all adults! Unless i see a certain someone somewhere then i will probably be hiding! HA! but that is very unlikely to happen since i havent seen that person in like 3 years. My sister asked me last week to go to church with her.. i said no and my excuse was to sleep in! sorry excuse.... if Jesus slept in, we would have no forgiveness... nothing to look forward to in life... no heaven in the future! instead HE AROSE!!!!!!!!!!! good testimony ehh? I just thought of that all by myself sitting here on my lil ol blog typing words! haha. but really i should arise as did Jesus.. and get my butt to church! I shall find a church and go to it! all the time! I don't think i've ever been a member of a church.... in my adult life i know i never have. i've been to the same church quite often but never became a member of any church.... I don't like to be the center of attention and they make you go to the front of the church....... how embaressing! haha jk. But you know what i'd like my husband to go to church too.... but he would never attend the type of church i like to go to! He would think they were crazy! haha! Nothing against ol baptist churches... but i like churches that sing and you can feel the presence of the Lord! I've been to baptist churches that say.... ohhhh do you feel the presence of the Lord... and my answer has always been NO!!!!!! but at the kind of church i like.... yes i do feel the presence of the Lord. anyways. next my resolution is to LOSE WEIGHT!!!!! doesnt everyone have that resolution? But really i need to lose some weight and look better that way i can wear nice clothes and not look fat! no im not fat at all.... but i weighed 120 when i graduated high school.... i'd love to be 120 again and be able to run and have all that energy again! i would love to run a marathon or half marathon or 5K or 1 mile! hahahaha! ill stick with the mile for now! Now, you guys may think I'm crazy..... BUT.... I would love to have my own business of some kind.... and really I would like to start my own preschool type thing... not a daycare because I'm not a babysitter. I love to teach kids and see them actually learn something. I push my kids hard because I want them to learn! I really never see that happening but it sounds fun. I would at least like to move up somehow in the early childhood field. Not gradewise... I honestly don't think i would like to teach kindergarten or higher... too much testing for starters.... and they have curriculum.... i like doing my own thing.. what i want. I don't have to be on the same thing anybody else is on.. i can teach what i want when i want... i love it. I have the best coworkers anyone could EVER have where i work at. I would love for them all to come teach at my new school.. HAHAHAHAHHAHHA!!!! I told my sister the other day... wouldnt it be cool if you could invent a town... fenced in with HUGE fences.. and noone could come in or live there unless you invited them! and this town had target, walmart, harps, old navy and all those good stores? and noone had to work there because the only people that lived in your town were honest people that would leave the money for what they took in the cash register. hmmm interesting. Now here's a good one... sometimes i just let people run over me and say what they want.... and i get very irritated but i just hold it in and keep the anger to myself but sometimes it all adds up and i just wanna BLOW UP!!!!!!! I have to stop doing that. Then sometimes, I see such happy families and I wish i had such a happy family... people think i do... and i do....... BUT sometimes i feel like i'll never be accepted... (by p) and i feel like i just don't belong here. he never wants to stay with me or do anything with me or when we go somewhere (all of us) he always asks if we are going and if d says yes.. he'll just be like awe man... and i get very mad sometimes...... i should stop because he's a kid and theres no telling what people tell him about me and i don't care honestly... but OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I COULD GO ON AND ON AND ON but ill stop just in case........... but it's really hard to go from my first marriage and practically raising the two kids i mean not really raising them but they always wanted to be with me to this marriage and the kid not wanting anything to do with me. Maybe its a part of me... me not wanting to be close to someone elses kid because of what happend the last time i got close to someone elses kids..... i dont know... but i really do treat him like my own...... i mean i try... if he'd let me i would... our family is like me and g... and then p and d... and people probly think i'm a bad person cuz i never take him anywhere with me... but i ask... i ask him all the time to go with me and he never wants to... there's so many things i want to say that have to do with this subject but here i go again holding it in... maybe i should let it out and i would feel better.... nah.. it would be like i was bad mouthing someone and i dont wanna do that and have everyone else read it. i'll just say some people just arent cut out to be moms.... HAHAH! and i'm talkin about myself... (NOT REALLY) sometimes i lie on here just so people don't think i'm talkin about them.... hahahahahah. i may not be a good mom but you know what i try! I could NEVER go a day without seeing my daughter and you know what I NEVER WILL!!!!!!!! and thats my new years resolution!!!!! hahaha. If i see my daughter being mean to someone you can guarantee she will be in trouble.. she seems to be tender hearted.. the one thing i truly love to see that i have instilled in her is to not lie! Sometimes when she doesnt wanna tell the truth about what happend she will say i dont remember... but then she will bust out bawling and tell the truth! She NEVER lies!!!!! that's one thing she better not EVER do!!!!! I was thinking last night that i was gonna make a resolution to not say ANY CUSS WORDS this year.... you think i can do that? i dont think i can... sometimes i get so mad at g and her whining that it slips... alot! HAHA! but i have to quit doing that and losing my temper with her.... i need to learn to stayyyyyy calm! count to 10! haha. but you know sometimes i have tried that and just tried to go to the other room and she will follow me screaming yelling at me!!!! and then i get even madder.... haha. anyways. so were you able to read my resolutions in all that jumble...... i hope not because i probably wont own up to any of them. i've had a lot of things on my mind lately... so this was fun because i havent wrote a blog in a while. guess what i have one more week off from grad classes and then bak to work! the two weeks off have been wonderful OH AND GUESS WHAT!!!!!!!!????? I GOT AN A IN MY SECOND CLASS ALSO!!!!! so far I have 2 A's I'm so excited..i bet they just get harder and harder. but maybe not..... hmmm. alright i reckon thats all!!!! I have another new years resolution too i forgot! I need to save money!!!! Actually I'd rathers buy some cows first and then make money off of them to save.... that way i can spend all my paycheck! HAHAH! I need to buy a house this year! My very own house! I've never owned a house! neither has my hubby... maybe this is the year we will finally own a house! hahaha. alright ciao!!! by the way did you eat your hog jowls and black eyed peas? I DID!!! HAPPY NEW YEARS!